Have you ever been scrolling through your social media and you see a quote, meme, picture etc. that immediately makes you think of a certain someone? Sometimes it brings a smile to your face, sometimes it can bring a tear to your eye, and sometimes it can just plain make you irritated, and you think to yourself, “Oh! So and so needs to see this!!” I know I can’t be the only one.

I saw this particular one a few weeks ago and I had that very reaction…just plain irritated! It took me back to a place in time that wasn’t particularly enjoyable for anyone that was involved and therefore a lot of big emotions are attached with those memories. BUT…it did make me think about how absolutely accurate this statement is: “A mistake that makes you humble is better than an accomplishment that makes you arrogant.”

Mistakes are just a part of life, plain and simple. We ALL make them, no one is immune from making mistakes. They do serve a purpose believe it or not. They are designed to teach us something, make us better, or maybe even see someone else’s point of view…BUT only if we allow them to. WHAT?! Here’s an even bigger shocker. Sometimes they can even show us that we need help. I’m not talking about help around the house, or help with homework or any of those types of things, I am talking about BIG help, like the help that comes with getting and STAYING sober.

I do not claim to be an expert about alcoholism, I am sure that I know very little about it. I know and acknowledge that it is a disease and it is heavily linked with mental illness, which I also do not claim to be an expert on. The one thing that I know with 100% certainty is this: A person CANNOT get OR STAY sober “alone” or “on my own” even if they think they can, even if they think they are invincible.

Over the course of the last few years, I have witnessed someone battle the bottle and every time, the bottle won. Start off strong, 1…2…3…4…months, then relapse. During the time when sobriety seemed to be happening, the question would be asked, “How are you doing with your sobriety?” The answer (more than once) was always, “Really good. This is the first time I’ve been sober for this long by myself.” Or, “on my own”. This was repeated several times in a short two and a half year period. At one point, a full year of sobriety was reached. Twelve. Whole. Months. Can you guess what happened? If you said a relapse, you would be correct. Do you know what I also noticed during the times when sobriety was happening? Arrogance. Whenever “on my own” or “by myself” was said, it was said with some kind of attitude that was telling those that were listening that “I don’t need/want you” and I always had the same thought, “But you DO need help!! That’s why you continue to relapse…Don’t you get it?!” There was literally a whole TEAM of people that repeatedly tired to help you, gave you the resources to use, and we were just dismissed with the arrogance of “on my own”.

The other thing about sobriety (and life in general) that I know with 100% certainty is that it is all about choices. We all have them. Sometimes we make good ones, and sometimes we don’t. When we don’t, that is usually when the mistakes come. They aren’t fun and no one likes them, but we CAN use them and we CAN overcome them…IF WE WANT TO!! Own your mistakes (humble yourself), apologize if you need to (humble yourself), ask for help (humble yourself) and use our mistakes to make better choices. We can be proud of our accomplishments, but we can’t forget the mistakes that it took to get there and ultimately we have to remember that it takes a lot of hard work, that ONLY we can do…no one can do it for us. They can support and encourage and HELP us along the way, but the work is ours.

“Every accomplishment starts with the decision to try.” ~Unknown